Woman Upset After Husband Rejects 'Lower Paying' Job Offer While She Works Overtime to Support Them

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NEED TO KNOW

  • A woman shared that her husband lost his $90K job two months ago and recently turned down a new offer paying $60K
  • She said she’s been working 16-hour shifts at her $19-an-hour job to keep them financially stable while he stays home
  • After supporting his decision to decline the offer, she realized she was angry and struggling with resentment

A woman sought support from the Reddit community following a heated disagreement with her husband after he turned down a job offer that paid less than his previous salary. 

Her husband had lost his $90,000-a-year job two months earlier, and while she said he “didn’t do anything wrong” to lose it, finding new work had proven difficult in the current job market. “I make $19/hr which isn’t much but does sustain us especially because I do a lot of overtime,” she wrote, explaining that she had been trying to support him through his unemployment.

Stock photo of a man giving a woman his resume.

The woman described how her job was physically demanding and left her body aching every day. “Either on my 16 hr or 8 hr shift and I still have to figure out dinner and other chores,” she explained, emphasizing that despite her long hours, she was still responsible for maintaining their home.

Meanwhile, her husband spent most of his days at home. “He’s home all day, [goes] to the gym and [applies] for jobs online,” she wrote, adding that she initially tried not to make him feel worse about losing his job. But over time, she began to feel frustrated that he didn’t seem to recognize how much she was struggling.

She noted that when their roles were reversed and she had been out of work for a year, she took care of all the household tasks. “I was doing all the chores, cooking, cleaning laundry, his lunch, everything,” she recalled. “I wasn’t bringing any income so that’s the best I could do at the time.”

Now, as the only one bringing in money, she feels her husband should offer the same consideration. “I love my husband but I’m starting to resent how he’s not being considerate that I might be tired and try to help me,” she admitted, acknowledging that he was likely feeling depressed and stressed.

Despite her attempts to talk to him, little changed. “I’ve communicated this with him and he’s agreed to help but never [does] or he’ll jokingly say ‘ohh I have to cook coz I’m a bum,’” she shared, adding that she would often end up doing everything herself anyway. “I’m tired mentally,” she confessed.

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The tension escalated when her husband finally received a job offer, though it came with a significant pay cut — about $30,000 less than his former salary. “He feels disrespected with that offer,” she said, explaining that while he asked her opinion, he had already made it clear how unhappy he was about it.

Trying to be supportive, she told him, “Don’t take it then, I’ll support whatever decision.” Moments later, he turned it down, and that’s when her emotions caught up with her. “I did support him doing that but just realized I’m so angry that he actually denied that offer,” she wrote.

When another Reddit user asked if she had discussed her feelings with him, she admitted that while they had talked many times, one thing was left unsaid. “The only thing we haven’t spoken about is me telling him exactly how I feel about him turning down the job,” she admitted.

Source: people.com